Taking Care - Self Care
Its been an entire month (and a few days) since I’ve last updated WBCPE’s blog post. In my defense, I had a perfectly planned blog about a past wedding that I wanted to share with you all but due to unforeseen circumstances, “we” decided it isn’t the right time.
So! Just like marriage, a monkey wrench has been thrown, I got off focus, but now I am back at it.
I’ve literally gone mad trying figure out what else can I possibly blog about that you haven’t already read? I even stalked other Wedding Officiants blogs and I was literally bored to tears when I saw similar posts on all of their websites. When to hire the officiant? Should you have a rehearsal? Wedding bloopers and so on. BORING!
After much consideration, I have decided to use this space as my personal journal about wedding planning, ceremony planning, married life, and wife life. Hopefully it won’t be too boring and if it is, consider it my small version of therapy and just pray for me mmmkay?
I’ll keep this short but I wanted to circle back on the “unforeseen circumstances”.
Dating, relationships, weddings, parenthood, and marriage is chock full of unforeseen circumstances. These life events are awesome until something unforeseen occurs and throws your whole life off. If you’re anything like me, you’ll try to push past any upset. You’ll be the strong one. You’ll carry the issue on your back in efforts to prevent those involved from falling apart. But most importantly, and unfortunately, during those times you’ll forget to take care of you.
Today, the idea of self-care is so prevalent, it almost makes you feel guilty that you aren’t somewhere on a yoga mat drinking a green smoothie whilst getting your toes polished and reading a self-help book.
Am I right?
Well here’s the thing, your marriage (or any intimate relationship really) can only be as strong as it’s foundation. If at the core of the foundation is God + the two of you (or just the two of you if you’d prefer), and one of you or the both of you struggle with taking care of yourself aka self-care, then your foundation will start to crumble.
I am NOT saying leave your job to relax on a yoga mat but if your job is causing you to stress to the point that you cannot be the husband/wife/bae/father/mother that you need to be then yes, leave your job to get on someone’s yoga mat.
EDITED TO NOTE: Talk to your spouse before leaving your job. I don’t need not one bride fussing me out because of this ok?!
You cannot provide a safe space for your loved one if you’re falling apart spiritually, mentally, physically, emotionally or even financially. You will most definitely fall short in some of these areas because we are not perfect, but whatever you fall short in, either God or your spouse should be able to lift you up and encourage you through your struggles and guide you into caring for yourself (self-care). If relying on either source is an issue or if the idea of caring for yourself causes you even more stress, please seek therapy.
It is THEE best thing you can do for yourself and your relationship.
If finding a therapist is even more stressful, please just pick up the phone and dial this number:
1-800-273- TALK (8255)
Light, Love, & Blessings,
Minister Sharnise Sears